**Every 60 days!**

So, I am here in Dubai on a visitor visa. This is good for 60 days at a time. That means that until I get my residency visa, I fly out of the country every 60 days and then fly right back. This wastes about 3-4 hours of my day but is always an interesting adventure. The first trip to Doha, Qatar: This trip was in the morning and allowed me 2 extra breakfasts, in addition to the one I had at home! However, since I look like trouble, I was detained in Doha. I am still not sure what happened. I arrived, checked in for my next flight and they told me to sit down and wait. They took my passport and boarding pass to the desk. I waited. They argued in Arabic for awhile. I went back up to ask what the problem was. The 2 security guards escorted me back to my seat. Ironically, my IPOD was playing "Bombs Over Baghdad" by Outcast. I changed it in case they were watching me that closely with bionic ears! Everyone got on the bus to take them to the plane. I repeated my inquiry above with the same result. Now, I am 3 minutes away from scheduled take off time and they return my paperwork with no explanation and send me to the plane. I have the worst luck! The second trip to Muscat, Oman: I thought that Doha was a crap airport. It is super compared to Muscat. Muscat seems to fit my idea of what a Middle Eastern airport would look like.... it is in the desert with industrial buildings surrounding it. There are about 8 gates in the entire place. I checked in at my return gate and there was some discussion regarding my passport. Then, the lady asked me to fill out a survey about the airport. In an effort to avoid another "incident," I asked her for a pen to fill it out. She said that she didn't have one. On principle, now I cannot fill out the survey. I had a pen in my bag but if your job is to get people to fill out surveys, you should have writing utensils. Not to mention, you are at work, there is nothing in that desk. She didn't understand. I sat down and kept the survey. On the way home, we received this sticker with our headsets: I was unsure where you were supposed to stick these. I thought about the forehead, shoulder, etc. Then, I turned it over and realized that I am not the only retarded person. Apparently, enough people are stupid so there needed to be picture instructions, like IKEA: My next adventure is coming up later this week. Hopefully, y'all won't see me on the news!!